Author Archives: mimitulane

About mimitulane

A Published author, wife and mother of three, grand diva of twp. My first published book is called Curiously Curious with Siren Publishing and was released March 6, 2013! The follow up in the series Seductively Seduced was released January 16, 2014 and my latest book, the third in the Mackenzie Dominants Series, Tempting Temptation releases January 12, 2015! You can follow me on goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6979633.Mimi_Tulane or if you'd be so kind as to like my page on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/authormimitulane Thank you so much! *smooches* ~Mimi Tulane ~

1st World Problems vs. Quarantine: Bitch, Please

frustrationFair warning: I am not even sure how I want to start this blog post. I mean I don’t want the tone to be all snarky, or bitchy because I have been dealing with snarky, bitchy people now for weeks.  Try as I might, I do not think I will succeed. This is definitely a Bitch, Please moment.

I guess what I’ll start off saying is that, despite the dire nature of the world’s event, meaning Covid-19, that most people are taking it seriously and trying to do their part in lowering the amount of acute cases, and maintaining a bit of decorum when “inconvenienced”.  These are the compassionate people who come into your place of business and are kind, caring, sympathetic to those who may be going through it.

However, this blog post aint about the people who act right, show some compassion, follow the rules of whatever shopping establishment that happens to still be SERVING shoppers. Nope.

I’ma call out the assbutts, the rude folks with their sorry, bored at home, can’t find anything better to do than to harass a cashier, or sales associate with first world stupidity.

It’s my blog so I’ma go where I want, and if you happen to resemble any persons mentioned in this blog, if I step on your toes—just say ouch.

Don’t go blaming Corona virus for the way you are acting; some of this ain’t the stress of the times. This stupidity was in your gene pool long before Covid-19 made it’s way across the ocean. I have reached my zenith of being over the snark, the BS, the dumb ass questions and petty ass complaints. There are people DYING ALONE in hospital beds, their loved ones unable to comfort them or be with them in their final moments. See, despite the gut wrenching, heart breaking reality of the now, even the hospitals have RULES in place to combat this plague. Let me remind some of you, that these families can’t even give their loved ones a proper send off, having to watch funeral workers in hazmat gear, lower their loved one in a cold grave from the inside of their car!

See, those are the images that galvanize me to say a prayer, smile a little more, encourage people, go the extra mile to be helpful and a sympathetic ear when folks are reasonably venting.

Then there’s the Karen’s and the Joe’s that show their natural ass over the fact that they can’t buy non-essential items, such as Candy-licous Red Paint, flooring or carpet (unless you order it from your local “big box home improvement store, the one with the blue and white logo…”online for curbside pickup), upset because there is a limit on how many germy, non-mask wearing, individuals that can be in the store, shopping at one time. The same said individuals, that are “frustrated” because they have longer than “normal” wait times, or get down right pissy because they have to follow the yellow brick road and use designated entrances and exits.  Bitch, Please.

What part of Pandemic do you not understand?

Okay, so you’re stuck at home, and want to get some of those projects done, the ones you slept on before all of this started, therefore they are not that important. Yes, I said it, you know that they are not, because if they were that damn important, the sh8t would have been done already, alright? Yet somehow, now that you are ASKED, to remain at home, you have to rush out and get them ALL done. Not a roof, or hot water tank emergency, you want to have a deck installed. Never stopping to consider that the department associate, or the cashier, the loader or customer service person is having to take the brunt of all your nasty comments, complaints, even THREATS for upwards of 12 hour shifts without so much as a thank you. Never mind that you cannot remain 6 feet apart on a close quarter job site. Oh no, you want to be upset because you couldn’t find an associate to help you find a chalk line, and why do you think that is? Could it be that the store is short of associates during this PANDEMIC.

Did you know many retail workers are over 50 years old and some with health issues that have them self quarantining? Take “my” store; where a third of the workers are older and now on leave and another third for many reasons also have to take leave. Which means, you have only one third of the workers in house, who are running themselves ragged, and you want to flip off , cuss out, and otherwise make an ASS of yourself, throwing a damn tantrum over having to WAIT in a long line? Or my favorite, “Why don’t you have any shopping carts?” You mean all the ones you passed up outside, the ones that have to be washed off and sanitized BEFORE handing them to you, by the same clerk you just went off on, who was attempting to get you a clean cart. Maybe you think you get a pass or have the right to give another human being grief? Bitch, Please.

I hope your first world drama will be enough to get you through, if—heaven forbid—you or one of your loved ones falls ill to this virus. I hope the compassion you did not extend to your Shipt shopper, the gas station clerk,  the fast food worker, the cleaning attendant, is extended to you. I hope the doctor or nurse that is treating you is not the spouse, mother/father/sibling of the retail worker you just blessed out. (It could happen, no seriously, I live in a small town and everybody is practically related to or married into some family.) I hope you never experience the grief of losing a loved one to a REAL virus and having to say goodbye over FaceTime or SKYPE.

But again, fair warning: If you think you are disappointed, frustrated, scared, angry or just sick and tired over having quarantine, crank that up a billion decibels because that’s how frustrated the hospital workers, the doctors, the nurses, the caregivers, grocery clerks, the delivery drivers, the HUMAN BEINGS that are putting themselves in harms way, unable to be at home where they WANT to be, but instead are at work, putting up with your first world, uncaring asses. Look, here: The days are growing longer, and patience is growing shorter. Even the nicest, sweetest person can go full on beast mode if pushed to far.

I’m here to tell my fellow first liners, it’s okay to say enough. We are not here for abuse, we do not have to deal with ignorant, insensitive, rude people who have their Underoos in a bunch and do not have the decency to go someplace private and pull them out!  No sir, no Ma’am. The door is that way. I won’t even trip if you walk out the entrance instead of the exit. I am here to say, emphatically, aw hell naw. If I wish you a good day and you start in on that tired tangent, “what’s so good about it”, I’m that cashier that will ask you, “Are you still breathing on your own? There’s a few hundred people who can’t breathe without a ventilator, so …” You want to bitch about a trainee who is doing the best that they can, to ME of all people about how they don’t know how to do their job? THEY IN TRAINING FOOL. I ain’t the one you bring that mess to, no in my line, I’ma call you out.  You wanna start a debate siting conspiracy theories and false narratives and down right fear mongering of the worse kind in my line? I ain’t feeding those demons. You can exit, stage left. Bitch, Please, if you could only see my face underneath this damn mask!

Listen sexy people, I have been reduced to tears, come home anxious, stressed out and fearful, not of the damn virus but of coming in to a job that I use to enjoy. There are straight up moments, where I am desperately  wanting to pull a Usain Bolt and run as far away from the madness that is retail right now! But no more. That ish is over. I still enjoy my job.  I don’t wake up mad every damn day and if I wanna smile and you wanna frown, free country still. But it’s for damn sure if I was feeling some type of way, I would not have the unmitigated gall to take it out on a stranger. My mama raised me better than that.

Yeah I rolled my eyes.

I’ll be the sweetest, most helpful person you need, but I will go for your neck if you come for me. Period.

If we all would just calm down, accept the disruption to whatever brand your normal is, if you the Karen’s and Joe’s of this world, could just put yourself aside for the greater good, we could truly be in this together. But that aint the real deal. For every 3 people that are kind and gracious, I now have 7 that make me want to shake them in front of Jesus. Not that long ago, I was able to say this statement but in reverse. And the more each state relaxes their restrictions or just plain reopens, during these chaotic times, it will only cause more friction, a vicious cycle really, because the truth of the matter is, over worked, workers are dropping like flies. The staff shortages will add to the customer’s frustration and lack of patience, and leave the retail worker reeling from having been cussed out by extra ass people,  buying extra dumb stuff  and complaining extra hard over things that aren’t in the associates pay scale, to wit the associate has a nervous effin’ breakdown, or quits because NOBODY can be strong forever. (insert Faith and Prayer here…)

But, hey, you want to ask for my manager, Karen?  Bitch, Please. I been paging his ass for fifteen minutes…he aint coming and you know why? Because he’s hoping I bless you out so he won’t have to. Real talk, Sis.  You want to threaten my job, Joe? I’ll hand your ass the vest, bruh. I’m just not taking any more unnecessary roughness. Flag is down on them kinds of plays, believe that.

Listen, things will get better. If you can’t bring yourself to be courteous and patient during your shopping experience, then STAY THE FECK AT HOME. And for the love of the sweet baby Jesus, wear a damn mask and gloves! For people who are so damn scary of the virus, are laid off without pay, you are still finding ways to come out to shop, spending money you need to be hanging onto. What’s worse, dragging small kids into a hotbox of hot mess and then bitching about the entire experience.

No Karen, I am not here for that. No one is.

A Letter to the Sexies, Randomly Rambling Edition

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     Hey there sexies, (Yawns, craving a cup of coffee)

     How’s your reading life? Any good TV choices? I’ve had plenty of both and I’m not getting a darn thing done. Well actually, I keep a thumb drive of ideas and story “starters” that might be something I want to explore at a later date (that I’d misplaced mind you) and came across it the other day. So, I perused. I had a few good ones and a few WTF was I thinking. At any rate, I dusted off a couple and began to add more content to them, so I suppose you could say, only if you wanted, that I’m writing. We’ll see how that goes, if I manage to finish something before the end of the year. 🙂

Kicking off my ramble, Daylight Savings Time. WTF? I mean seriously, what is the big deal? I lived in Arizona for three years and they do not fiddle with the frickin’ clocks and life went on. Why can’t it be 5:00 p.m. all over the U.S. at the same damn time? Sun will still rise and set at regular intervals. It sure would make remembering what time The Haves and Have Nots (insert your addiction here…shout out to Tyler Perry) is on! Meh, but I’m probably one of the few people who wonders why we still have, in this modern age, an electoral college. We have A.I and all sorts of iPhones, etc, drones that drop off veggies and porn to your doorstep, but we still can’t count each vote, a simple, one per person kinda thing—really? Whatevs.

And since I’ve gone political, I wish the frickin’ ads for the political candidates actually told me what the hell they want to do, why they want to do it and just leave it at that. I go to the polls scratching my head and that is not how I want to choose people! I’ve never been chosen for a job that I’ve applied for by clowning on the other applicants, ever…so why should people who will be in charge of all manner of governmental p biz, get to have jobs by doing the same? Again, Whatevs.

Rambling on…

Leaves. I’m already over them, man. The hubby and I chose a fairly nice day last week or so to clean up all the mess from our trees and before the day was out, didn’t look like we had done a damn thang. (eyes rolling) Then somewhere between then and TODAY, all my damn trees decided to strip and get bucky naked and I ain’t feelin’ it! I’m telling myself that I’ll get to it when it decides to stop raining. I am not the one to be raking wet ass leaves…However, in preparation I head to the store to grab some more lawn and leaf bags and guess what? DON’T NOBODY HAVE ANY! (breast heaving in (mock) outrage) Plenty of toys and Christmas decor in the garden section tho’…

And before some random ass person jumps my ish, I am not anti Christmas. I am where the feck are the lawn bags, cause I gots me some serious yard work to do before Muskegon decides to spit snow. End of Story. So run and tell the PC police, the alt Right, the Leaning Left or your mama, that yes, I will say what I want, how I want and you’ll laugh with me! (Mhmm, I see you shakin’ your head)

Well at least I hope you are smiling, laughing or finding some joy from something. I know the days can be tense, with no end to the shenanigans in site. Yet even in the midst of it all, you have to laugh. Hug someone. Smile. None of that cost money. And it generally begets the same. Another smile, more laughter, bigger hugs.

This concludes my Random Rambling for today. Go Vote. Tuesday, November 6. Then come home and grab a hoagie, or smoothie or a box of chillable red or whatevs, and remember to keep smiling, laughing and loving.

Until next letter,

Simply,

Mimi

 

 

Don’t Quit Your Daydreams

The funny thing about starting a new pursuit in life, is where to begin. You know you can’t go back. You feel awkward in the place you are standing. Yet still, you have no clear indication of where you are heading…you just know that you are heading somewhere, someplace; new. I read a quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson that in nutshell says, “Whatever you do you need courage…” There is more to the quote but bottom line: nothing gets done without courage and you taking your first step.

The journey of life isn’t just about the destination but more about the motion, the movement, and no journey begins by standing still.

Of course we can let others paralyze us with fears, imagined or perceived. We can allow their critical eyes to cast doubts on our own convictions. I have found that when other people tell you why you should not make waves, tell you how to follow your heart, condemn your desire to follow your dreams, it’s not because they are worried about the mistakes you’ll make. Everybody makes mistakes. They are actually voicing their own fears, misgivings and regrets for not doing the same; taking action, following their own dreams or convictions, or remaining in a place or place in their life, that they know they’ve outgrown or were never welcomed, in the first place.

For whatever reason, they found themselves in a rut; a comfortable, predictable rut and stayed there, and how dare you find the will, the courage to chase your dreams!  You can empathize, really. Maybe they wanted to be a ballerina but let someone tell them they didn’t have the body type for it. Maybe they wanted to start a business, but let someone tell them they didn’t have the education for it. Whatever happened to discourage their own attempt, they got caught off guard by the questioning of the individual or individuals that lacked the courage to do their own thing, and allowed those voices to dim the hope they nurtured for themselves. They might have got caught slipping, but you nor I have to.

Even with all that background noise, it’s never too late to start over, start fresh, turn a page or turn a corner. If the thought of chasing your dreams feels uncomfortable then good; at least it feels. It means you are not numb. Living a life without feelings isn’t living. Emotions can be a great motivator or dictator, whichever you give in to. It is okay to feel something: anger, sadness, anxiety, hope, love, understanding, compassion and yes, sometimes, fear. However, out of all the things you may find yourself feeling, the one emotion to look out for, the one feeling to stand up against, is hopelessness.

Once you start down a road that leads to hopelessness, then fear and doubt will want to tag along and those two will feed off of you until it becomes an incessant, consuming hunger. So how do you combat hopelessness in the midst of your journey?

If you have a passion in life, do it. If you don’t know where to begin, start with a book about the subject. Ask others that are following their passion. Strive for it. Don’t give up. Your critics will always have something to say, but it’s not what they say, it’s what they do. And if all they are doing is trying to discourage you from following your own path? They aint doing shit…just full of it.  Actions have and always will speak louder than words and will always say more about the person or people you surround yourself with.

So, put away anything that does not nourish your soul, or your dreams. Surround yourself with positive inspiration and positive people. You will find that you can be your own worse critic so why be bothered with any other critical assed folks? Instead,  feed your heart and mind with creativity…and whatever you do: don’t quit your daydreams.

Believe it or not…I’m still here: First letter to the Sexies January 2018

 

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Hello out there!

I want to wish everyone a Happy Belated New Year! A lot has transpired in my life that has been life driven so writing had been placed on a shelf temporarily. My family has experienced the gamut of life: New births, deaths, relocating, new jobs, new home…and through it all, I kept telling myself I will get back to it! I keep ideas on tap for new stories, and I plug away—just not consistently—here and there on established works in progress. I’ve finally gotten a hold of my time management; with that, comes a few changes. I have two blogs that are now going to be condensed into one. I’ll actually be working on moving the content from there, to here, today. Although not a resolution in the New Year’s traditional sense, I have resolved to be fiscally responsible this year. So paying for but not using a blog isn’t a justifiable expense! I can easily post the stories I have on that blog here as well, with a few creative layout changes and blog upgrades!

Speaking of blogging, it’s my hope to post regularly on my blog if only to stay present.

So far, no new books in the Mackenzie Dominants Series since book three, but there are more stories to be told for that world. Your continued patience is everything to me. I accept that I need to put more umpf in the getting material done arena! I am also still desiring to write a paranormal story/series and have a few outlines in my idea pile to peruse. Who knows: 2018 might be the year for those!

Thanks for hanging in there with me and I’ll catcha later!

Simply,

Mimi

My Word When Was The Last Time I posted a blog?

Hello Sexies!

I know, it’s been a while. Last blog post was September 2015? Crazy! Then again, it’s Mimi, crazy is as crazy does! I haven’t been idle. I haven’t been as productive as I had hoped either. I tore up (and by tore up, I mean, deleted this is the digital age…) my book four for the Mackenzie Dominants. I hated it. I went and got some advice on the direction then began anew. MAYBE I’ll get it finished this year!

I am not a fast writer!

Don’t get me wrong ideas are always on and poppin’ in this cranium. Yet balancing my responsibilities, my writing, my mental health, my physical health, my relationships, my Mimi time…one of these days, I’ll have that AHA! moment. I aint had it yet tho’… 😀

Now during this lull in my writing I’ve gotten a few other dreams realized. Hubby and I bought a mobile home. We got us an extended single wide in a stellar community in Norton Shores, Michigan. I absolutely love it. Our journey to home ownership wasn’t a quick nor easy one but we finally made it! We are loving the new digs, especially for our son. We can now get him out of the house more (perfect sized yard) and into the fresh air. My son is autistic and prefers solitary activities that don’t involve many social situations. It’s a thrill to see him go outside and explore his surroundings. He loves having a larger room, and his own bathroom! I think we all like having an extra bathroom! No more knocks on the door or setting the timer for the allotted shower times!

Of course there are all the things that come with home ownership versus renting like mowing your own yard. We had to buy a lawnmower! 😀 Of course the fun part is the yard wars. Man I have some neighbors that go beyond the Pink Flamingo thang! I’ve pitched my hat into the ring right along with them. I’ve started small, just a few hanging plants and solar lights, but I have plans… yeah you should be afraid!

So life is happening in between the stories. I am still role playing, collaborating with friends on some stories that we have in various online spots. When time permits Nikki Green and I add to the Gangstah Love Blog, and as always I keep outlining and plugging away on Mackenzie Dominants and my indie projects.

In short life is being kind to me. Until next time Sexies, enjoy your journey. Take time out to pursue your dreams, love your love ones while they are still with you, and don’t forget to love yourself.

Simply,

Mimi

 

 

 

 

And The Journey Continues

1laptop2_smallI’ve come to realize that making choices that might affect others isn’t always an easy thing. Especially if it’s not a popular decision. When you set out to accomplish a dream or goal, hard choices will come into play. You may lose a few folks along the way, bruise your knees when you stumble but ultimately, there has to be a determining factor that propels you forward. That makes you get up, dust off and start the journey all over again.

Part of that process is knowing your own limitations. Being able to admit that your plate is full and refuse the second or third helpings. Sometimes you even have to pass on the dessert. It’s not that you don’t enjoy the cook’s cuisine, but knowing when to say I’ve had enough, I’m full or no thank you can sometimes take finesse. Even so there are bound to be a few offended chefs.

First rule of hard decisions is accepting you cannot and will not please everybody. That will derail your determination before you even leave the station.

I use these analogies to say that what you (or I) may value and place the highest priority on isn’t necessarily placed in the highest regard for others. And when you have to say no, take a step back, lighten your load, it isn’t always understood but it’s still a necessary, next step in the going forward process; unequivocally so when you have allowed all the extras to get you off track in the first place! It’s not enough to step on the scale of life and see the extra pounds and and do nothing but complain about it!  You (I) have to be willing to do the extra work to shed the weights (or cares of this world) to get back into form. If that means less television, less partying, even less hours on a job to pursue your dreams, it takes the courage to know when to say when. To decline invitations when you have an outline to work on. To pass on starting that new fall television show to work on your writing. To even let go of distractions and even those pastimes that you enjoy, to refocus on what made you want to write in the first the place.

Despite it all, hard choices are not impossible ones. Difficult to make at times but you can do it. Unpopular decisions may make you feel rotten but they are not unbearable. When you think of the outcome, of the rewards of being diligent, you can survive being unpopular. You either make the choice to work for your dreams or you sit back and live with the regrets of not trying.

When that journey becomes a solitary one, remind yourself that you signed up for it. Call to remembrance the joy the journey brought you. Understand that your dreams are non negotiable. Give yourself permission to accomplish your goals.

 

 

First Letter to the Sexies of the New Year

1laptop2_smallDearest Sexies:

Happy New Year!

My hopes for you is that the new year has greeted you kindly! As for me, my latest book in the Mackenzie Dominants Series, Tempting Temptation is due for release January 13th, 2015 on Bookstrand.com. I am very excited about that. Many changes have happened, none that I would bore you with; some good, some sad, all a part of the journey we call life. I’m grateful to see another new year!

I’ve migrated over to Google Plus so if you happen to be that way add me to your circles! I am still on Facebook and Twitter respectively. I have a few self projects in the works but mostly I am allowing the batteries to recharge. Of course I am getting in a little bit of reading here and there and still roleplaying {collaborating with friends} in my online writing group as time permits.

All in all the year 2014 ended and the new one has begun. I wouldn’t take anything for my journey thus far!

Simply,

Mimi